The Bomber and the Belle headed to Desire Riviera Maya (RM) in March of 2022 and had a blast! For those who don’t know, Desire RM is a clothing optional resort in Cancun Mexico. It offers couples a luxurious experience that allows guests to be sexually free and… well… naked.
We, like many people planning their first trip to Desire, had a million questions about what we should expect and how we should prepare.
After our experience, we put together a list 15 things that people should know before heading to Desire RM.
It is worth adding that these tips are based on our experiences. Others may have a differing opinions based on the time and the crowd.
You can also check out our podcast episode on Why More Black People Don’t Go to Desire for more details on our experience, or if you are simply not in the mood for a read. You should also check out the Monogamish Marriage podcast episode on lifestyle vacations.
1. In terms of luxury and rich people sh*t, Desire is where it’s at
Desire is a fancy a$$ resort. Everywhere you look will be a gorgeous scene worthy of a painting. Everything from the pool with the swim up bar, to the 5 star restaurants, and beach beds screams high quality, premium, first class living. If your question is, “what exactly is it that I am paying for.” you will get your answer immediately upon entering the space.
2. Don’t expect a lot of racial diversity at Desire RM
Desire seems marketed to a White crowd and a White crowd is what you will see. But there will likely be diversity in terms of nationality. We ran into folks from various European countries and others from Central and South America. There were a sprinkle of Asians in the crowd, but for the most part we are talking about a crowd of Latin and non Latin White folks. We counted about 5 Black people in total.
3. The crowd is super sociable
Hands down this is one of the friendliest environments we have ever been in. Most people want to talk and mingle, making this different from any vanilla resort you will ever go to. Based on what we heard, it is the main thing that keeps people coming back. Even for the quietest introvert, this environment will bring out your inner charmer.
4. Do expect a range of body types and ages
The folks at desire were not like the typical lifestyle crowd we see. We were surprised to see a lot of young folks in the mix. Ages ranged, with some in their 20’s to mid 40’s. Body types were also varied, with the chiseled to the voluptuous. One thing we noticed after hitting up the pool were the number of augmented breasts with varying ranges of quality. Yes t*tties be out and about at Desire, trust and believe.
5. Take opportunities to meet other guests before getting there
You can log on to a desire forum that allows you to connect with couples that are going to Desire at the same time you are. You can also allegedly find a Desire group on Facebook that could give you access to group chats, curated based on when you are staying at the resort. We actually met a few people who connected with each other before arriving. We tried to connect with folks using the desire forum, but forums aren’t good for that sort of thing. It was a treasure trove of information we would not have known otherwise.
6. If you want to keep your clothes on it won’t look weird
Everyone can be naked at Desire on most of the property, but not everyone bares it all. If you don’t feel comfortable walking around butt a$$ naked, no worries. But don’t be surprised if you feel like letting yourself and clothes go after the first or second day. The Bomber got naked on day one and the Belle was topless most of the time, although there was a sexy lady that walked around the hot tub taking off bottoms and making the husbands wear them like COVID protection masks. She will be missed.
7. You don’t have to tip, but the service will make you want to, so bring cash
Tips are not required, but it may help you in subtle ways. The service is absolutely spectacular. Servers remember your favorite drink, they check in constantly and are willing to go the extra mile to make sure you get what you need. They are so good, you will want to put dollars in their pocket. And dollars can only make them better at what they do. If they don’t have your favorite drink at the bar, a good tip might make them drive off premises and stock it for you.
8. Take the opportunity to visit other sexy Desire resorts close by
Both Desire Pearl and Temptations are a short taxi ride away. If you are not the kind of traveler that will find themselves in Cancun every few months, take full advantage of your stay by visiting these locations. Both of them give you an entirely different experience. You might be able to sit down for a timeshare presentation at Desire RM and get a free voucher to do so. That’s what we did for our free day trip to Temptations and it was so worth it!
9. The nightly entertainment is off the mother f*cking chain, so don’t miss it!
I know there is a lot to do, but do not skip the nightly entertainment. It is a Broadway level epic experience. They have some of the sexiest dancers and performers doing amazing shit in gorgeous lighting. It is a pleasure to the senses and will never disappoint. Plus, you paid for it!
10. Don’t stress about getting a pricey room, you wont be spending much time there
Unless you are getting one of the lavish beachfront suites, I would not stress spending anything extra on the rooms. Honestly they are pretty much underwhelming regardless of where they are, and you won’t be spending too much time in them. Go for the garden rooms, no one will judge you, and they are honestly not that different from the others.
We went for the beachfront deluxe and it was nice to open our doors and see the beautiful beach. But we would have been fine just walking up to it from a garden view room.
11. Not everyone who goes to Desire is familiar with the Swinging culture
This is a swinger friendly environment, but it ain’t really a swinger environment. Don’t expect to see the kind of swapping and play that you see in other lifestyle settings. The people who come to Desire range from veteran swingers, to newbies, to vanilla couples that can’t get enough of the friendly environment that we referenced earlier. But any swapping is surprisingly discrete at Desire. This ain’t gonna be the squirting, hot tub orgy, c**shot Olympics type environment that you might get at Hedo. Check out our Bliss cruise episode where we talk about the epic pool party experience we had at Hedo.
12. People pretty much stick with their partners
This is a couples resort and people rarely separate from their partners. For newbies, this really can take the pressure off. But if you are used to swinger environments where couples divide and conquer, prepare for a different experience. This is definitely a wife swapping economy that is not as friendly to anything outside of an MFMF play scenario. Parallel play might be the low hanging fruit for you freaks out there.
13. Take advantage of the photo shoot, it’s worth it!
Desire offered a free photoshoot for guests while we were there, but we did have to pay for the photos. For the most part, they are willing to take any type of picture you want. Want some pictures walking on the beach? No problem. What about a few shots dancing on the swinger pole at the disco? You got it. A few photos of the your wife giving you that reverse cow girl action? Say no more! They will pretty much take photos with you anywhere on their beautiful grounds. There is just no reason not to do it. We just took a couple of shots in the bedroom, because we were far too hungover for a 3 hour shoot!
14. Make reservations at them restaurants
This is one of the few things at Desire you may never feel like doing, but you need to go ahead and get it done. The restaurants on the grounds are really nice, and there are several of them. You will want to try them all. If you don’t make a reservation ahead of time you may have to book at a later hour. This could mean you might miss the nightly entertainment. Happened to us twice and will be one of the big regrets in our lives.
Making dinner reservations with a couple could be a good way to get a date.
15. You will want to plan your next trip back
Yes, Desire is one of those places where you will say “man we gotta come back here!” If this is one of those places you can seriously see yourself coming to every year, it might be worth becoming a member. We knew we wanted to travel to other places so we didn’t go that route. But it was good to know the option was available.
We may definitely be returning in the future so we hope to see you there!